Book Quotes

I learned a great fear of being wrong that shifted my mindset from thinking "I'm right" to asking myself "How do I know I'm right?" And I saw clearly that the best way to answer this question is by finding other independent thinkers who are on the same mission as me and who see things differently from me. By engaging them in thoughtful disagreement, I’d be able to understand their reasoning and have them stress-test mine. That way, we can all raise our probability of being right. In other words, I just want to be right - I don't care if the right answer comes from me. So I learned to be radically open-minded to allow others to point out what l might be missing. I saw that the only way I could succeed would be to: 1) seek out the smartest people who disagreed with me so I could try to understand their reasoning. 2) Know when not to have an opinion. (Pg. 36)

You should be what I call open-minded and assertive at the same time - you should hold and explore conflicting possibilities in your mind while moving fluidly toward whatever is likely to be true based on what you learn. (Pg. 191)

Open-mindedness means considering the reasoning of others instead of stubbornly and illogically holding on to your own point of view. To be radically open-minded, you need to be so open to the possibility that you could be wrong that you encourage others to tell you so. (Pg.189)

Open-minded people approach everything with a deep-seated fear that they might be wrong. (Pg.197)

If both parties are peers, it's appropriate to argue. But if one person is clearly more knowledgeable than the other, it is preferable for the less knowledgeable person to approach the more knowledgeable one as a student and for the more knowledgeable one to act as a teacher. Doing this well requires you to understand the concept of believability. I define believable people as those who have repeatedly and successfully accomplished the thing in question - who have a strong track record with at least three successes - and have great explanations of their approach when probed. (Pg. 190)

Remember that you're looking for the best answer, not simply the best answer that you can come up with yourself. The answer doesn’t have to be in your head; you can look outside yourself. If you're truly looking at things objectively, you must recognize that the probability of you always having the best answer is small and that, even if you have it, you can’t be confident that you do before others test you. (Pg.189)

People interested in making the best possible decisions are rarely confident that they have the best answers. They recognize that they have weaknesses and blind spots, and they always seek to learn more so that they can get around them. (Pg.189)

When two people believe opposite things, chances are that one of them is wrong. It pays to find out if that someone is you. (Pg. 190)

Open-minded people: assess their relative believability to determine whether their primary role should be as a student, a teacher, or a peer. (Pg. 196)

An idea meritocracy encourages thoughtful disagreements and explores and weights people’s opinions in proportion to their merits. (Pg. 36)

Radical open-mindedness is motivated by the genuine worry that you might not be seeing your choices optimally. It is the ability to effectively explore different points of view and different possibilities without letting your ego or your blind spots get in your way. It requires you to replace your attachment to always being right with the joy of learning what's true. (Pg. 187)

In thoughtful disagreement, your goal is not to convince the other party that you are right - it is to find out which view is true and decide what to do about it. In thoughtful disagreement, both parties are motivated by the genuine fear of missing important perspectives. (Pg. 190)

Can you point to clear facts (i.e. Facts believable people wouldn’t dispute) leading to your view? If not, chances you are not being evidence-based. (Pg. 200)

Expect that what gives you bliss today may not be what does tomorrow. Just follow it all over again. (Pg. 16)

If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it, and this you have the power to revoke at any moment. (Pg. 69)

The reasonable person adapts themselves to the world, the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to themselves. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable person. (Pg. 235)

He suffers more than necessary who suffers before it is necessary. (Pg. 513)

Busy is a decision. The excuse, “I am too busy” is not only the most inauthentic, it is also the laziest. We do the things we want to do, period. If we say we are too busy, it is shorthand for “not important enough”. Simply put: you don’t find the time to do something, you make the time to do things. (Pg. 26)

Time and attention are very different things. They’re your most precious resources moving forward. Just like you walk through the air and you swim through the water, you work through your attention. It’s the medium of work. While people often say there’s not enough time, remember that you’ll always have less attention than time. (Pg. 208)

Suffering is not an objective condition in the outside world. It is a mental reaction generated by my own mind. (Pg. 560)

Happiness is a choice you make and a skill you develop. (pg. 33)

Am I rehearsing my best self? Where should my attention be right now? (Pg. 192)

Someone asked me, “Are you worried”? I should say, “Would it help”? The answer is no. (Pg. 146)

The great majority of that which gives you angst never happens, so you must evict it. Don’t let it live rent-free in your brain. (Pg. 281)